Re:tro Re:view – Warcraft!

Jondee here in Azeroth,


I was all set to see Warcraft, it was #10 on my anticipated movies of 2016 list, but the reviews discouraged me. So I waited, listened to a friend recently who said that it depends on your Warcraft knowledge how much you would enjoy the film. I know a little, some names, places, but it looks like China’s $200M has kept the Warcraft fires burning. I was hopeful for Duncan Jones especially after seeing Moon. I was ready to see the film, I try to see almost every fantasy film, but it was only at a bargain theater. Great! if it was as the critics said, I would only lose $2. Assessment, the film is boring at the beginning, I fell asleep and woke to see the Humans camping before an ambush, it picked up from there. There is too much excess in this film, it needed to be tighter, still what I feared would be CG excess is not so much. The orcs look real, their faces, and eyes, but their massive hands (how do they build anything?) just conflicted with reality. The same with the backgrounds, it would have been more believable shooting in actual locations rather than mixing the fantastic with mountains, castles, etc.  The fault of this film is kinda like Legend of Tarzan, except where that one was fun, this movie read like a video game at the beginning, then packed in characters and even a demon.


The stand-outs, Travis Fimmel (from Vikings) as Lothar (I kept forgetting a few names, they need to identify and repeat some of them), Toby Kebbel (Dr. Doom in Fantastic Four and Messala in Ben-Hur) as Durotan, and Paula Patton as Garona. Patton’s character is interesting, her part Human character looks real compared to the CG Orcs, I wished they would have gone the make-up route.  She is conflicted, a warrior, trying to find a new loyalty.  Next is Ben Schnetzer as the apprentice wizard, Khadgar, though his acting didn’t make up for the weak part. I liked Dominic Cooper as the king, but again I saw him more of a type than a person until the end of the film.  Callan played by Burkeley Duffield, son of Lothar, was interesting, but if his father was really worried about him, putting him on the battlefield is kinda poor, why not send him to protect the Stormwind castle? The bad Orcs are just so bad that I didn’t get their motivation. I would have put some intro with the first crossing over to Azeroth, narration, whatever, and then move to Durotan struggling with the evil Orcs and bringing in Lothar to stop them. I’m also confused if those griffons or flying beasties are used as war mounts, why not fly in to save the innocents? why not use them to bring in aerial strikes? No one seems to use arrows or siege weapons.  There’s one plot, but about six sub-plots all running around in this film! Gamers may love it, fantasy fans? gotta see it on DVD or Netflix, casual fans, it’s up to you if this is interesting.  Three Frostmournes out of Five!

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